richwhitelesbian:

powerdad bellows at his son “TIME FOR BED!” rowdy son says “no dad fuck off” powerdad starts bench pressing his son till hes dead and then it is always bed time

elvve:

*bangs fist on table* I WANT COLD WEATHER

  • Cashier: *dies at register*
  • Customer: are you open

karidevereaux:

…an ode to 1970s skater girls. 

chilloutmotherfuckr:

booty made out of straws so you can SUCK MY ASS

chilloutmotherfuckr:

booty made out of straws so you can SUCK MY ASS

basedgosh:

im going to get strong muscles so i can carry the animals out of sea world and put them back in the ocean

thewicked-eternity